The ‘Ex’ Factor, And How It Applies To The Realities Of Life…

source: bossdanteblog
37

Ex is another word for former. For example, an ex-boyfriend means a former boyfriend. An ex-boyfriend is a man who is no longer a woman’s boyfriend. For one to be a n ‘ex’ it means that there was a time both persons were an item, whether friendship, relationship, association or whatever, the ‘ex’ person and the person or persons who regards him as an ‘ex’ used to be together. During the past periods when this ex was still with the person or group, he is bound to have always done everything that are necessarily done within such relationship or group. For example, the general presumption about an ex-boyfriend is that he must have done all the things a boyfriend does with his girlfriend during the pendency of the relationship. This includes romance, assistance, sex etc etc. Most times, these things still continue after the relationship has ended, due to the fact that once a line has been crossed, the probability of crossing that line again becomes high. This is because certain things have became normalize,- shyness and boundaries were broken. The guy isn’t shy to talk about his sexual urge, the girl is also isn’t shy to talk about her fantasies, they’re both not laid back from asking for support from each other, be it financial or emotional support. Now, they might move on to other relations, but still find it hard to move from this ‘normal’ which has become a part of them. Your greatest competitor in your relationship is your partner’s ex, and not the new ones trying to get in. There are many factors that might have caused the break up, For example, maybe the ex initiated the break up, but your partners was still and is still interested; maybe distance separated them, one travelled oversees, so they had no option than to move on, but the feelings is still there; maybe the one who initiated the break up is now regretting, (he misses her and has found out that ‘the grass isn’t greener on the other side’, she is much better than the one he left her for, and now he wants her back) etc etc It takes a lot of courage, commitment, self discipline and conscious effort to go back on a boundary when a line has been crossed, especially when the experience one got when he crossed the line was fun and ‘easy’.. This is why they say, “once a soldier, always a soldier”, This can further be broken down to mean “once anything, always that thing”.. For example,- once a cheat, always a cheat (one who has cheated before wouldn’t find it hard to cheat again especially when he/she wasn’t caught and he/she had fun or got a reward from the cheating), once a smoker always a smoker (this is the same with one who has smoked before, he wouldn’t find it hard to do such again, after all, he didn’t die when he did it the first time, he has overcome that initial fear he had for it), once a hoe, always a hoe (one who has had sex for money before won’t find it hard to do such again, the fast and easy money from the first time gave her more encouragement, she would rather pick that ‘easy’ way than work legit for money, whenever she’s faced with little financial difficulty, instead of being innovative, all she’ll think of is who she can have sex with and be rewarded with it in cash, this is the reason behind the saying – ‘Never Make A Hoe an Housewife’, cos in most cases, the hoe tendencies is still there, she has been used to that normal and would find it difficult to change for better), once a fraudster always a fraudster (this is the reason a lot of guys involved in fraud don’t stop until they are caught and jailed. They have made lots of money they never imagined they would make in their lifetime but would still continue that illegal lifestyle until it ends them. This is because this lifestyle has become the new normal for them. They are now used to the ‘easy’ way of making money and even if they stop for a while, when faced with a little financial difficulty, they’ll be back to their vomit). This is the why they say “A Leopard never changes its spot”! WHAT DO YOU DO? 1. Don’t be coaxed or pressured to involve yourself in any immoral or illegal way of life at all. Let that ‘beginners’ fear and doubt still hold you back from trying. 2. If you have already started, you need to take conscious and practical steps to pull out, you can’t say you want to stop a life style and still remain and hang around friends who still live and encourage such lifestyle, you are only deceiving yourself. In other words, you have to distance yourself from such friendship, this includes your ex in a relationship (you shouldn’t encourage still being friends with your ex after break up, it’s time bomb waiting to explode.. distance yourself from them as much as possible, break off unnecessary communication, like asking about your wellbeing and other stuff that are not formal, if possible break off communication totally), the only communication you can have with an ex or friends of your past should be formal discussion in formal settings, avoid having informal discussion and meeting in informal environment. (why would you be visiting your ex at home if you are not deceiving yourself, why would you be hanging out in club with your past friends who still involve in fraud or prostitution, it’s only a matter of time before you’re dragged back in) 3. Change your cycle of friends and relate more with people living moral and legal lifestyle. The popular saying of “show me your friends, and I’ll tell you who you are” is true. If you want to know who a person is, you can do so by just knowing who his or her friends are. Lions does not walk with goat, lions walk with other lions, if you’re comfortable being friends with people of questionable character, then obviously, something binds you all together. 4. Pray. While doing the work to pull out, you also have to pray, cause sometimes, the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak. sometime your strength would fail you and the only support you will need is from God. Don’t hesitate to ask him for help.. I’ll drop my pen here. Lets hear your view on what you think on this topic.. Click on the link below for more interesting contents... Bless

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