Why Do Men Not Get Married? Part 1


Several decades ago the model was that a woman would give her youth, beauty, and fertility to one man. In exchange for this, the man would provide the woman with a home and security for 40+ years. Obviously, it wasn’t quite that simple, but that was essentially the nuts and bolts of it. Now the model seems to be that a woman gives her youth, beauty, and fertility to several different men. Then after about a decade or so she decides she wants to find a “good man” to settle down with. What this usually means is she wants this good man to pay her bills and help her raise her two or three kids that all have different last names. YOU DIDN’T WANT HIM THEN, HE DOESN’T WANT YOU NOW. Remember the awkward geeky guy in high school that she stepped on and over to date the football player? Well now it’s fifteen years later and the geek is pulling down a six-figure salary working for a tech giant, Who do you think she wants to be with now? FEMINISM, OR WOMEN’S LIB AS IT USED TO BE CALLED. In the old relationship model, the man was the woman’s primary source of security. Therefore, she had a vested interest in making sure he stayed strong, confident, satisfied, and happy. Then women were told that they could provide their own security and didn’t have to depend on a man for it. One of the byproducts of this newfound empowerment is that a great many women now have little concern for what a man needs or desires. The men that end up with these women often find themselves very low on their list of priorities. They come in behind, her career, her children, and her other personal relationships. YET SHE STILL WANTS HER MAN TO MAKE HER HIS PRIMARY FOCUS. My conclusion is that in the old relationship model when a man got married he worked hard to provide safety and security for his wife. His reward was that he got someone to bear him children and this person also became his best friend, confidant, and lover for life. That seems to be a pretty equitable arrangement in my opinion. Now it seems that men are putting far more into marriage (voluntarily & involuntarily) than they will ever get out of it. Some men just don’t see the reason to take the risk anymore. These are some of the things that I believe make men not want to get married.

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