I Will Take My Mother’s Boyfriend Secret To My Grave- Forgiveness Is Not For Me

source: tiktalkhub
51

We were living in Benin with my parents. I and my siblings were born in a troubled polygamous home. There was always fight and quarrel and not enough to eat. My mother had 3 of us for our father. And he didn’t even care for us. Things got so bad that my mother ran away from the marriage when I was just 9 years old. She left us to find greener pastures in Lagos. She was away for three years and we truly suffered those three years. She finally came back for us three years later and took us to live with her and her boyfriend in Lagos. We lived in a one-room apartment in Mushin and even though we were happy to be with our mother, things were still pretty tough. I kept going to school but I was not doing well cos I had so much to do at home to help my mother. My mother was selling food in a bukka. I would help in the morning before going to school and soon as I resumed, I went to help her at the bukka. Me and my siblings did the same. I could barely make it to JSS 3. By this time, I was getting a lot of attention from boys and men that came to the bukka. My mother encouraged me to ‘smile’ for them so they would keep coming and even tip me. Life was hard. I discovered my mother was the one even paying for the house rent with the boyfriend. The boyfriend was a much younger man and he was more into gambling than making any headway. My mother by then, had a son for him. As a young teenager, I used to love to dance and listen to music…anytime I got a chance to, I danced to keep myself happy and forget my troubles. Someone invited me to their church, one pentecostal. I joined their dance group and I received praise anytime I danced. But a young artist in our neighborhood told me I could make money with my talent. He told me about dancing in clubs and music videos. I told my mother but she refused, saying I was too young. But I kept getting pressure that I could make money from dancing. They talked about artists like Kaffy and many others who dance and get paid. I decided to lie to my mother that I was going to church all night. That way, I would run to the club to dance and boy…I was good…I got money. A producer hired me for his music videos. I started making money and also started getting involved with men. My mother taught the church was paying me to dance for them. One day, I was at dancing at the club and saw my mother’s boyfriend with another chic. He was surprised to see me cos I was just 15 years at the time. He was going to tell my mother about me so I begged him not to. If I had sense at the time, I would have also threatened to tell my mother I saw him with a woman but I didnt know better. So, he scared me into believing he would tell my mother. Except I do something for him. What did he want? He wanted to sleep with me. I had no choice but agreed. So, he kept my secret and was sleeping with me to keep my secret. I began to believe he was in love with me more than he loved my mother.

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